If you’ve been poking around www.FunLove.com as of late, you might notice that we are no longer selling a certain grouping of products. This includes anal desensitizing creams, throat numbing creams and vaginal shrink creams. Why? Because we want to promote positive sexuality, and these items do nothing but drag sex positivism down.
Let’s start with anal desensitizing/numbing creams, usually with a brand name that sounds like Anal Eaze or something similar. Why is this bad?
Sex is not supposed to hurt (with the exception of certain forms of BDSM where you decide you want it to hurt before it starts). Really, it’s not. At times, you may feel pressure, or even a little soreness afterward, but if it hurts while it’s going on, something is wrong. Pain is your body’s way of telling you to stop, re-evaluate, and to figure out a less hurty way to have that type of sex. In the case of anal sex, pain can mean that you’re not using enough lube, that you didn’t get enough warm up (and remember, it can take a good amount of warm up over a long period of time in order to be comfortable fitting large objects in your rectum), or that you’re just not in the mood for it now. Using something to numb that pain so that you can continue is like taking a narcotic so that you can hammer a nail into your hand.
Not only that, but if you ignore the pain, you can actually cause physical damage. Anal sex hurts because something isn’t right; this means that you could be creating small fissures in your skin that can be open to infections of multiple types, and can even help with the transmission of STIs. If you numb that and keep going, you can even cause tears and bleeding in your anus…sometimes without even feeling it until the numbness wears off.
There are some easy ways to have good, fulfilling, non-numbed anal sex, and we’ve written some tips here. Long story short, use lots of lube, take plenty of time, and wait till you’re really ready. Some great lubes for anal are System JO Anal and Gun Oil.
In the same vein, throat numbing creams, gels and balms keep you from feeling what is going on in your mouth and throat during fellatio. Because of this, you can bruise your throat, aggravate your tonsils and more. Plus, you can’t really feel what you’re doing, which makes for mediocre sex at best. If you’re really wanting to deep throat (and please keep in mind that 65% of the nerves in the penis are in the top third of the shaft), you can get some good tips from fellatio books, and also practice by using a dildo that is approximately the same size as your partner’s package.
Let’s talk shrink creams. What do they do? Well, they use something called alum to basically dehydrate the vagina. Yup. That’s all they do. It’s like putting your naughty bits in a fruit dehydrator. Once they’ve lost a lot of the liquid that is NATURAL in your vagina, it feels tighter. Why? Because it’s all dried out. Having sex with your vagina in this state can open it to cuts, infections and more, as well as make it easier to transmit (both give and get) STIs. Plus, often, it will hurt. So then you’ll want to (smartly) add lube, but all it winds up doing is re-hydrating your vagina and you end up exactly where you started.
Solution? Kegel exercises. Try working your PC muscles on your own. First, next time you’re peeing stop the flow, to get an idea of where the muscles are. Then, next time you’re hanging out at your desk, car, couch, etc, work on squeezing them. Better yet, get a pair of kegel balls, and have them do a lot of the work for you.
So all in all, that is why we’ve decide to discontinue selling anal desensitizing, throat numbing and vagina shrinking products. None of them are body friendly, the ingredients in them haven’t been tested (so no one knows if they can do horrible things to you), and there are many many many better ways of having safer, enjoyable sex that doesn’t involve trying to trick your body into doing something it isn’t ready to do.
Questions? Please shoot me an email at shanna@fascinations.net.
{ 1 trackback }
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
So are all stores really going to stop carrying said items? What about the clientele that actually need desensatizing sprays for prolonging and etc…
Samthrax –
The stores are going to slowly pull the above products while still educating the community as to how to have safer versions of the sex they help.
However, neither the web site nor the stores are getting rid of penile desensitizing/pro-longing sprays, as these have a different use entirely, and are not body unfriendly. Never fear